Be Still And Know

Last week was my first work related trip of 2009. This is pretty incredible considering "Q1" (someone please pinch me hard for allowing corporate speak to so densely infiltrate my world) is almost over. Prior to August of 2008, I'd traveled basically every other week for several days per trip for two solid years. I was so tired of leaving home, my husband, my friends, any semblance of a routine, community and sanity to fly up and down the east coast on business.

Business travel is so rarely glamourous. One has little free time to see their new location as your schedule is jammed packed with work (at least for those of us who are trying to pack 4 days of work into 3 or 2 so we can get back home more quickly). Evenings are in your hotel catching up on all the admin you didn't have time to address during the meetings and appointments that were the reason for your trip. I was estatic at the opportunity, and oh-so-grateful to my supervisors, for allowing me to demote myself last year. I'm more grounded - literally - I'm not flying as much, and - figuratively - I'm more aware of what is truly meaningful to me: my family, friends and home.

This life lesson came much earlier than I anticipated, and it's been a gift. The luxury of a job I enjoy again and the down time to appreciate other important elements of living. So, I wasn't at all bitter about this 2 day, 2 night trip I had to attend team meetings at our HQ. Unfortunately, the productive meetings ended with a real low blow. 2 members of our 18 member team were being let go due to the downward spiralling economy. These members were selected not because of any performance lack, but for other revenue related reasons.

It was an upset to everyone, and did nothing to encourage me to take care of myself over the weekend. The weather in DC was dreary and overcast from Friday til well, still. I drank too much and lay around the house eating take out and watching Tivo. That previous sentence consists of 3 very enjoyable pasttimes for me, but nothing in excess in a good thing. I was so proud of myself for working out at the dinky hotel gym both days I was on the road. Bringing healthy snacks instead of indulging in the eclairs the meeting planners had delivered to our room. Yet I allowed the bad news, concern for colleagues and general worry about the future to have the upper hand.

Today, I got back on track eating healthy, working out at the gym both cardio and weights. I don't readily enough turn my fears and concerns over to where they belong. If I believe (and I do) that the Lord in charge, that He has a plan for us all, that He works everything for good...then why am I not always chipper, perky and confident in the outcome of events? The human condition seems to be a cop out response to my own question. So, I'm signing off with some thoughts for me to ponder and internalize:

"Be still and know that I am God." -Psalm 46:10a

"Be anxious for nothing, but in everything through prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God." -Philippians 4:6

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. -Jeremiah 29:11